In the previous episode we witnessed the importance of “Saptha-Pathi” during a marriage event. We saw how important it is even in the modern day. In the due course, we also saw that once the “Saptha-Pathi” is done, there is no question of separation between the couple. Thus we also saw that if we take the marriage ceremony seriously and chant all the manthras and slokas with utmost sincerity and dedication, definitely the married life would be a heaven for all of us!
In today’s and perhaps tomorrow’s episodes we shall extend this very important point in a bit more detail and see what are the challenges, couples encounter in the modern day, and some possible solutions to overcome them. Of course, this is a very subjective and a sensitive topic; however, I shall just talk about my perspective in a generalized way.
In the last couple of episodes we’ve repeatedly been seeing that the very purpose of a marriage between a couple is to undertake and follow the path of “Dharma” (Righteousness) together. You might all be wondering as to what is this “Dharma” all about! My answer to this question is the following: There are various aspects of life that are embedded within the term called “Dharma” – Predominantly the “Varnaashrama Dharma” (Performing the duties and responsibilities of one’s family). Within this “Varnaashrama Dharma” there are numerous sub-aspects to be looked into – For instance, maintaining peace and harmony within the family, performing the “Pithru-Kaaryam” (Periodic rituals for our parents after their demise), and the list goes on! We’ve spoken in detail about the “Pithru Kaaryam” in the previous episodes and I’m not going into it at the moment. The main duty to be discussed at this moment is how to maintain peace and harmony within the husband and the wife.
Thus, once the “Saptha-Pathi” ritual for Rama and Sita is done, it means that there is no question of separation after that! Whatever issues, problems, etc. that confront in front of us, we need to tackle them together as a couple! This is one of the biggest problems that pose a threat to the modern day society. Nowadays, the husband and the wife are losing patience and the will to take on challenges and problems together, thus ending up fighting with each other, the fight goes overboard and thus finally ending up at the court premises, filing for a divorce! Let us think for a moment – What are we going to benefit from all this? Do we really think that we would be a much happy person after the divorce? Do we spare a moment to think that we are complicating our life even further by resorting to a divorce? We should understand one basic fact of life here: There would definitely be some good days and some bad days in our life. This might arise due to numerous reasons – Perhaps because of the various planetary positions which we undergo every day in our lives – There might be terrible days of not concurring with the views of the other person. But that doesn’t mean that we proceed for a divorce!
I strongly feel that that whenever there is an issue at home, it is always better not to exaggerate it too much. We should try to let go of certain things. We should learn to agree to disagree! We should know that life becomes sweeter when we learn to sacrifice things! Why am I saying this? In our lives, there are going to be certain times when we are going to be extremely happy and victorious in whatever we do! And there might be certain times wherein we need to undergo failures (sometimes disasters too). We need to prepare ourselves to face any situation with adequate mental strength. Most of us might know an old proverb, which says “There hasn’t been a person who was happy continuously for 30 years, and there hasn’t been a person who faced failures continuously for 30 years!” Thus, it is very important for all of us to understand that both success and failure in life are bound to happen and this should not in anyway tamper the harmony between the husband and the wife! In fact, we should not even have the smallest of the smallest thought of “Separation” or “Divorce”! Whatever maybe the issue, whatever may be the fight, we should still live together and try and resolve it within us!
Another issue in the modern day society that I commonly see on numerous occasions is that, many people start giving out “innovative” reasons for divorce. Most importantly, present day people have a new term to describe – “Chemistry”! Nowadays, it’s a common trend amongst youngsters, proclaiming that the “Chemistry” with their spouse isn’t working well and hence we are going for a divorce! According to me, all these so-called “innovative” arguments are just rubbish! My only question to these people is that, instead of blaming “Chemistry” for their separation, why can’t they use their “innovation” to make this “Chemistry” work well with their spouse? Moreover, I strongly opine that all these “Chemistry”, “Physics”, “Biology”, etc. will automatically augur well within a couple, but will take time. We need to be patient for it to happen! This is why I repeatedly keep saying that the more we sacrifice and let go of our ego, the more happier we would be in life! The moment the other person realizes that we have sacrificed a lot for them, he/she would definitely be in tears and the “Chemistry” will automatically start growing! All of us know how many problems did Rama and Sita encounter together. Did they ever speak of separation even for a single moment? If Bhagawan comes and takes birth and encounters this much of difficulties, what are we? Hence it is very important for us to realize this fact of life!
There is one more important issue that hampers the harmony within a couple of the modern day, which we shall discuss in the next episode! Stay tuned! 🙂